As an early adult I did a lot of soul searching. One day I was reading an Awake magazine while I was riding on a bus. A pair of Latter-Day Saint missionaries asked me if I liked to read. When I said I did, they asked if I would like to read The Book of Mormon with them. I agreed. I had a lot of competing theology going into my head at the time and didn’t think adding the Book of Mormon would make much difference one way or the other. So, I started the missionary discussions. There were six at the time. The first was about having faith in Jesus Christ. The second and third introduced the idea that the Gospel needed to be and in fact had been restored by Joseph Smith Jr. The fourth one was different. The missionaries told me to be a “worthy” member I would have to stop drinking, stop smoking both tobacco and marijuana, stop sleeping with my girlfriend, and start paying ten percent of my income to the church. I was immediately done with them. I showed them out, told them not to return. They did not.
But Latter-Day Saints are a record keeping people. My phone number was on file somewhere and about two years later another pair of missionaries called me. We went through the discussions again, but they focused on the first four principles of the Restored Gospel found in the fourth Article of Faith of The Church. I had faith in Jesus Christ, was a little more repentant about my drinking and smoking and was between girlfriends, so I agreed to be baptized and receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. They also taught me that the Restored Gospel wasn’t complete unless I endured to the end. I agree to try.
It has been nearly 27 years since I joined the church. I’m married and faithful now for 25 of those years. I quit smoking tobacco about 12 years ago and have been sober four a little over 4. I have started taking THC again in gummies which is not breaking the law in the form I’m using and is not technically against the dietary laws of the church. I’d probably still need to stop that to pass a worthiness interview but I have issues with the idea of worthiness which reinforces my worthiness issues. I’m also drinking a lot of coffee and tea which are definitely against those dietary laws, I’m not as industrious as I could be because I like to spend my free time on video games and arguing on social media, and I’m looking for Heavenly Mother who is not technically part of the Godhead. But I’m still in The Church and don’t see that changing in the foreseeable future. Am I “enduring to the end”? That’s for God to decide.
As recalled in March 2023
Latter Day Sinner 